Not as Easy as It Looks

Sometimes it happens that, when you begin to pray, you find you can pray well. At other times, even when you have expended great effort, you may find your efforts frustrated. This experience is given to make you learn that you must exert yourself constantly, for having once gained the gift of prayer, you must be careful to keep it safe. - Evagrius of Pontus

Yes, and why would we think that prayer should be easy? My thinking is that, if this is something that is right and good and honors God, then he would honor it and protect it from distraction or temptation. This goes back to the brownie point system. If I do this, then I will be rewarded. Gee, I almost sound like a millennial - I should be rewarded for just showing up.

Prayer has frequently been presented in our culture as a gentle, passive, generous activity. It's a way of showing honor and respect to God and a gesture of support and encouragement to those we pray for. Paintings show individuals quietly and serenely on their knees or with hands folded in prayer. We are touched by their example of humility and entreaty.

At what point was prayer put on the level of an afternoon tea party? Nothing I read in scripture, nor do I see in the lives of the apostles, martyrs and saints, suggests anything but blood, sweat and tears when it comes to prayer. Think of Christ spending entire nights in prayer. Think of Hannah praying for a child. Consider the deacon Stephen as he was being stoned. There is a battle raging around us - greed, power, immorality, hatred, and covetousness. Our human resources are powerless against them. These enemies are greater than what we can see, touch, taste or feel. They can only be confronted and managed by a power stronger than ourselves. Initiating prayer against them is only the beginning, for that only puts the enemy into a rage. The heat rises and the attacks increase. You have been warned.

If we see prayer as an option or another way of coping with the stresses of life, then perhaps we have deluded ourselves into thinking that we are fairly protected and secure, thanks to our 401K, our steady income, health insurance, life insurance and retirement plan. The present economic crisis and energy shortage have revealed just how fragile these provisions can be. We have placed our trust in them for so many years that we have lost sight of who truly gives us life and our daily provisions. The true battle, however, is won, not in accruing more assets or increasing our insurance plans, but by continual communication with the Almighty God and wrestling with those forces unseen - as if our life depended on it. It does.

Stand up Straight

When an archer desires to shoot his arrows successfully, he first takes great pains over his posture and aligns himself accurately with his mark. It should be the same for you who are about to shoot the head of the wicked devil. Let us be concerned first for the good order of sensations and then for the good posture of inner thoughts. - St John Chrysostom

Chrysostom's statement caused me to stop and think of how often, when I am being "attacked" or sense spiritual oppression, I take a defensive position - just hoping to avoid the arrows flying around me. There I am crouching in the corner with my shield held up in front of me.

St. Chrysostom paints a very different scenario, one that makes me recall the consummate archer in Lord of the Rings - Legolas. When sensing attack, he lengthened himself to full height, drew the arrow from his quiver, and with great precision placed it against his bow. There was intention, concentration and a narrowing of focus, as he zeroed in on his target and gauged the distance between them. In archery, you don't have the advantage of the "shotgun" effect - hundreds of pieces fanning out toward the enemy in hopes that enough of them will mortally wound him. No, you have one arrow, carefully placed and intentionally directed toward your foe. The success of the directed arrow depends on the physical and mental disciplines of the past and the ability to let them play out at the exact moment of danger. Our battles are not won on the battlefield. They are won in our daily position before God and our participation in the life of the Body of Christ - prayer, humility, confession and worship. A posture check might be in order.

Broken Pots

There is more joy in heaven over a converted sinner than over a righteous person standing firm.

A leader in battle has more love for a soldier who returns after fleeing, and who valiantly pursues the enemy, than for one who never turned back, but who never acted valiantly either.

A farmer has greater love for land which bears fruitfully, after he has cleared it of thorns, than for land which never had thorns but which never yielded a fruitful harvest.

- St Gregory the Great

At first glance, this appears that God loves the broken more than the holy. Ah...but what we think is holy and what God considers holy are worlds apart. Trying hard to be holy does not constitute holiness. Doing "holy" things does not confer holiness. Embracing holy thoughts does not give birth to holiness. Holiness cannot be copied or manufactured. Only God can impart holiness and righteousness. Only he can bring out true love, grace and mercy in our lives. There is only one source of these heavenly, holy virtues - God himself. There are no shortcuts. There are no substitutions. You have to have the genuine article or else it's a cheap imitation.

But we don't like this pathway! It's painful, humiliating and degrading. If I choose this road, it will be filled with insecurity, vulnerability, humility, and weakness. How could that be good? This flies in the face of all we have been taught in the American culture about freedom, liberty, the pursuit of happiness and wealth. There really is a "fork in the road" and there really are 2 very opposite journeys. We have the choice. Our sense of logic and rationality cannot grasp that brokenness, contrition and servant hood could be the best position for life. Society calls us "losers" and "unambitious." We become a "drag" on the upwardly mobile and the fiercely independent. We don't want to be reminded of human weakness, failures or faults.

But God...God's power and love blazes forth in the midst of this environment. The soil is ripe and fertilized, ready for tremendous growth and fruition. Now he can do mighty works and bring many more to himself for salvation and redemption. Pulling the thorns and getting bloody, admitting failure and standing up again, asking for forgiveness and apologizing, being willing to give up the comfortable and satisfying - these are the things that produce great results, great glory and great joy. It's counter intuitive, I know. But it's all a part of God's upside down kingdom. This truism is repeated over and over by the church fathers and the martyrs who lived it and saw the reality in their own lives.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

[Paul speaking to the Corinthians]

Praying for Others

Do not set your heart on what seems good to you but rather what is pleasing to God when you pray. This will free you from disturbance and leave you occupied with thanksgiving in your prayer.
- Evagrius of Pontus

As someone who was a part of evangelical circles for several decades, I was always instructed to be specific in my prayers for others. This ended up being a great frustration to me over the years, because I didn't know what specifically to pray for people. How could I know what would be best for them? How could I know all the details of their situation? There was always the attempt to get as much information as possible from those who requested prayer, so that "more effective prayers" could be offered on their behalf. This practice frequently resulted in an hour of "sharing" and no time to pray!

But even when I possessed a great quantity of background about that individual and what was going on, I still didn't trust my own conclusions on what God should do in the situation. My prayers ended up being "Lord, if it is your will..." do this or that. Why was it necessary to verbalize a variety of possible outcomes to the situation in my prayers? How could I hope to pray for another's situation when the events in my own life rarely made sense!

I have found tremendous freedom in the Eastern Church as we petition God on behalf of others. We ask for God to glorify himself and that his kingdom would be established here on earth as it is in heaven. I am not required to be the spiritual guide for everyone who asks me to pray for them. I need only bring that person's needs before the Father and ask for his mercy and blessing upon him/her. My focus is on the Godhead and the power and mercy and love that is shown toward us. I plead on another's behalf, as I do for myself. God's answers are too varied, too marvelous and too complex for me to even fathom them in my mind. As Mary, the mother of Jesus, was known to do, she saw others' needs and took them to her Son. Remember the wedding at Cana? Mary didn't presume to tell Jesus what he should do. She merely presented the situation to him. As I hear a person's request or see his/her situation, my responsibility is to lift them to the Father. Those who have gone before us also pray for us, and we can ask them to join us in our prayers to the Father.

There is this constant flow from us and the saints to the throne of God and back - a continual "conversation". The Trinity is working in marvelous ways each and every day, throughout the world, and we are a part of that heavenly stream of faith, hope and love. May we not become entangled in what we should request or how it should be presented. May our focus be on pleasing you.

Link by Link

Why do you increase your bonds? Take hold of your life before your light grows dark and you seek help and do not find it. This life has been given to you for repentance; do not waste it in vain pursuits.
- St Isaac of Syria

Here are some of my thoughts on this:

• We can add to or increase the "chains" that bind us - these chains can be in the form of addictions, fear of the unknown, fear of the unanticipated, anxieties over job and career, financial worries, fears of failing, I am reminded of that scene in Scrooge where Ebenezer's previous friend and co-worker, Marley, explains to Ebenezer that the chain he bears was crafted by himself "link by link". We have a natural tendency to blame others or circumstances for the chains that bind us. If we are truly "free in Christ" then those chains are crafted by ourselves.


• We have been given a certain amount of light - wisdom? discernment? - but that light can fade and disappear completely.


• We have choices in regard to how we respond to things that happen to us or what things we wrap our lives around.


• We can seek help too late - answers will not be given and we won't find the hope for which we are looking.


• We can "waste" our life by running after those things that are not eternal - status, material goods, the approval of others, physical pleasures, beauty, relationships, careers, money, security, the praise of others, etc.


• New concept - the life God has given me is to be contemplated with the end result of repentance. It is not for my pleasure, my benefit, my selfish goals. If practiced daily, such an attitude would radically change my outlook on life! My life has meaning only in relation to God. That said, my soul is in a sorry condition and needs repentance and cleansing from sin daily. My "feet" need to be washed daily, and the only One who can effectively wash them is Christ through his shed blood and broken body.

My prayer in the morning should be: "Lord, my heart is wicked and prone to evil always. Have mercy upon me."

My prayer during the day should be: "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner."

My prayer at night should be: "Lord, I have sinned without number in what I have done and what I have left undone. Have mercy upon me."

Living in the Kingdom

Love Christ and put nothing before his love. Christ is everything. He is the source of life, the ultimate desire, he is everything. Everything beautiful is in Christ. - Father Porphyrios

Do I believe this? I want to. Scripture affirms the statement. But the world I live in each day mocks and dismisses such thinking. Key words: love, everything, life, desire, everything, beauty. He promises me love, life, beauty, and fulfillment of my deepest desires in Him. The world promises the same things, but insists on being able to define those things for us.

• The love the world gives us is artificial, sadly dependent on circumstances and the sincerity of the people who give it.


• The life the world gives us is limited and eventually runs out, leaving us with discomfort, loneliness and physical deterioration.


• Our desires for the things of the world are fleeting, unpredictable, often thwarted, and characterized by the law of diminishing returns.


• The beauty that the world offers is showy, skin deep, fickle, subjective, misleading, and constantly changing.

The world promises that we can have it all. In reality, we each get only a little bit of the pie, and even that does not satisfy our deepest longings.

We truly spend a lot of our waking hours pursuing love, life, desires and fulfillment in this world. Why do we do it? What reward are we looking for? We are such earthbound creatures. We can't imagine what we cannot see, and yet Christ came to us and taught us to look toward that which is unseen to fulfill all our human desires - the kingdom of God. Our comprehension of love, life and beauty are so limited by what this world has to offer. And Satan would love to keep us in the dark in such matters of the heart. We carry the kingdom of God in our hearts, but our senses continue to search for it in the world around us. Call me a mystic, but I am thinking that the reason we struggle so much in this area is that we spend an inordinate amount of time trying to fill ourselves with the world around us and too little time in the kingdom inside of us. I Cor. 3:16 - "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?" We don't have to sit in a church to spend time in the kingdom of God. We just need a chair, a quiet spot, and the Holy Spirit who dwells within us. How marvelous, how incredible, how incomprehensible it is that God has given us all that we need to be transported into his very presence at any moment. We just need to practice carrying our heart before him, asking for his mercy and cleansing, and then humbly receiving his love, his life, his eternal beauty. He will fill our hearts to overflowing. He is generous, loving and kind. He longs to pour his blessings upon us and gather us in his arms. Oh, my soul, why do you stray from the Good Shepherd every day? Lord, train us to hear your voice more clearly in the midst of the roar of the world.

Insomnia

The night was not made to be spent entirely in sleep. Why did Jesus pass so many nights amid the mountains, if not to instruct us by His example? It is during the night that all the plants respire, and it is then also that the soul of man is more penetrated with the dews falling from Heaven; and everything that has been scorched and burned during the day by the sun's fierce heat is refreshed and renewed during the night; and the tears we shed at night extinguish the fires of passion and quieten our guilty desires. Night heals the wounds of our soul and calms our griefs.

[John Chrysostom, Hom. in Psalm VI]

Talk about a radical concept. From infancy we have been conditioned to believe that we need 8 hours of sleep in order to function properly and to be emotionally and physically healthy. When we wake up in the middle of the night, we assume that something is wrong with us. Type "insomnia" into Google and you get 24 million sites. Americans spend millions of dollars each year on medications to help get to sleep and stay asleep all night. Almost everyone I talk to is on one of the familiar brands advertised on TV. Sleep clinics are big business.

This quote from John Chrysostom [347-407 AD] led me to rethink my views on sleep. I was always a bit uncomfortable reading passages in the gospel that described Jesus' nighttime journeys to the mountains or remote areas in order to pray. Surely, he didn't mean for us to follow his example. I mean, he was the Son of God - one would expect him to do that! The disciples didn't seem to accompany him in these wee hours of the morning. Perhaps this was just a Father and Son thing. But it still bothered me. There was something there that whispered, "If it was important to Him, why wouldn't it be important for you?" I can't think of any other place in the gospels where Christ said, "I'm doing this but don't think you have to."

We tend to think of nighttime as God changing the sign in the door from "Open" to "Closed" and ceasing from all activities. But God continues to work even during the night hours. Invisible things occur which have tremendous impact. The earth "breathes" and cleanses itself (in spite of our continually making it more and more difficult for that transformation to happen daily with our pollutants and destruction of forests and oceans). Some animals find food at night. Dew descends from the cooler air and blankets the ground with welcome nourishment and water to replenish that which was lost during the day. We are a part of the great Creation. Why wouldn't we be included in this marvelous, daily cycle of healing and renewal also? Yes, God restores us by giving our bodies rest and our muscles relief from use. But nighttime can also be an amazing time for spiritual awareness, insight and dialogue with our Father. Next time you wake up in the middle of the night, make sure it's not your heavenly Father requesting a midnight moment with you. You might find healing for your hurting soul, encouragement in the midst of your trial, or the cleansing of tears shed over sins or sorrows. There were some pretty amazing events that occurred in scripture during those early hours of the morning! You'll be amazed when you start thinking of them.